Today was the best day I’ve had since I started writing about all of this stuff a few days ago. Everything was normal in a really nice way. My mind felt settled and the day flowed by in a steady, enjoyable fashion. When days like today happen I just soak it in. Hopefully I’ll have a few days in a row like this and I can be nice and even minded when I visit the counselling lady on Tuesday and explain everything to her properly.
I might even print off some of these recent blog posts so I can refer to them if I clam up on the day or feel nervous talking, like yesterday when my intention was to tell my mate about everything but instead avoided it. Still, I told him today – via Whatsapp – and hey, he was cool about it and supportive. I mean, I need to trust more in receiving that kind of reaction when it comes to my closest friends, they’re my best friends for a reason and I know if the shoe was on the other foot I’d respond in exactly the same way, supportive and with understanding.
I know I’ll still find it difficult though. Deep down there’s still a fear of being stigmatised, of being side-lined by everyone. I’ll get over it in time.
As for the rest of tonight, to cap off a good day I’ll be cooking some chicken and sweet potato chips and finally getting round to watching this,
which comes highly recommended by practically everyone who has seen it, including the master behind my favourite ever horror film – The Exorcist – William Friedken.